Finding Sunsets

So I was on my way home a while ago, I had a lot on my mind and was having a rough day. Then I saw something that brought me peace. I was driving over the hill when something in my mirror caught my eye. The sky was beginning to turn pink, a brilliant painting in my rearview mirror. It was so beautiful I had to pull over and watch the sky transform.

Ever since I was really little I have loved when the sky is pink. My mom would call to me when the sky was beginning to get that lovely rosy shade and I would run outside to watch. The pink mixing with the blue and bleeding into the white fluffy clouds creating a wonderful feeling of whimsy, like a sky full of cotton candy. As I grew older watching that spectacular painting change right before my eyes still holds just as much magic as it ever did when I was a child. I’ve seen hundreds of sunsets over the years. Brilliant ones in the Caribbean over the ocean, ones that seem to go on forever while flying over the clouds in an airplane, and ones over the field on my way home; but this particular one, as I was driving home that day, was different. This one wasn’t just another sunset.

I was upset, my plans were disrupted again and I wasn’t sure how on earth I was going to get back where I was supposed to be. But then I saw the sky. It was like God was saying "I painted the sky pink for you tonight, just to make you smile. Do you really think I'm going to let your future fall apart, just because of a few bumps in the road?" Nope, I'm going to be just fine. Because my future is in God’s hands. And if God loves us so much that he will paint the sky pink just to make us smile, why would He let us down when it comes to planning our future?

As I watched the colors in the sky that night I was reminded that God painted that sunset, and He made each and every one of us to be just as amazing and our lives to be just as beautiful as that spectacular masterpiece; because we, just as that sunset, are His creation. I also realized that sunset meant I made it through another day. It may not have been easy and there may have been a few tears, but I survived. And just as the sun disappears peacefully beyond the horizon in a magnificent display of color, only to rise new and fresh in the morning, so should we. Because God is holding all of our tomorrows, and that is what brings me great peace every night I watch the beautiful sky turn pink.

LOVE

Love, what is love? One of the most complicated questions. The question becomes even more complicated due to the limitations of the English language. “Love” can be shown and felt in hundreds of ways, yet, we only have one word for it. One word to express love for a friend, family member, or a “significant other” alike. It’s no wonder we end up with misunderstandings. Someone thinking we said we loved them with intentions of a romantic relationship rather than as a friend. This far too often leads to not telling someone you love them at all, even though you do, for fear of it being misinterpreted. I have come across this far too often. I have guys who are friends who, though I do love them, it is not in a romantic way, therefore I don’t tell them and am careful of how I show it for fear of my intentions being misinterpreted. Makes me wish we had a different word for a romantic love verses a family or friend type love. And that isn’t unheard of.

There are different languages that have multiple words for “love.” Did you know that in Greek there are 4 different words for love? Each meaning a different kind of love, from a romantic kind of love to more of a brotherly love. I’ve heard there are some languages that have 90 or more different words for love. Could you imagine? 90 different ways you could more accurately express the love you feel in different situations. Even having 2 or 3 words for love would drastically decrease the times the word gets misinterpreted.

I can love a guy without wanting a romantic relationship with him. In fact, that’s what God calls us to do. To love everyone. Our neighbors, family, and enemies alike. But that does not mean that by saying “I love you” or showing my love by the things I do means I’m looking to be romantically involved. I should be able to tell anyone I love them without having to add on so many extra words in explanation so that there isn’t any confusion.

However, I’ve decided to stop letting the fear of being misinterpreted run my life. I will tell my friends I love them, adding on all those extra words if necessary. Everyone deserves to be loved and know they are loved.

 

If you would like to continue the conversation, please do! Comment here or on my Facebook Page! Thanks for reading!

Costumes And Characters: The Enchantress

And here we are, Halloween. So, here's the final (for now) character in my story who is also my Halloween costume this year!

I wrote these chapters a while ago and after I wrote the Mad Hatter Chapter I really didn’t know what came next. I mentioned this to a friend of mine who knew I was writing these and she said that maybe I was in the wilderness. The waiting place. And at the time I truly think I was. I was preparing, in limbo, waiting for whatever God had planned for me next. But now, now I know what chapter comes next, what character. And that is what I will share with you now.

This character appeared last summer, the day before my sisters Graduation Party. I walked into the kitchen to find her and some friends of ours (really more like siblings) creating characters for themselves. So, as I listened to the crazy characters developing around the kitchen table, naturally I wanted in on the action. There was an undercover princess, a time traveler, a werewolf, and a demi duck… that’s a long story of its own… And that was when Crystal the Enchantress appeared. All our characters continued to develop all throughout the summer and continue to develop even now. Back stories emerged, new adventures began, new characters joined the game. And Crystal the Enchantress began to get her own little personality.

The most unique part about Crystal is that she enjoys turning herself into a dragon. But that’s not the only interesting part about her. What I was surprised to discover as The Enchantress began to develop was that she has a little bit of every character I’ve ever been in her. Everything from a fairy to The Mad Hatter, it’s present in her personality, just as it is in mine.

She’s regal and majestic like a princess to start. She has magic and she has a passion to help people like I did when I was the fairy in my story. She also has the power to heal people and creatures with her magic, like I did as a fairy.

She lives in a castle and takes in countless creatures if they have nowhere to live, much like Jamie The Jungle Princess. Anything from everyday animals to wizards and warlocks take refuge in her castle. And I’d like to think her castle sits atop a cliff somewhere overlooking the ocean on one side and perhaps a jungle or magical forest on the other. And she doesn’t just have a love for animals, her flower gardens would be immaculate both inside and outside her castle.

So the jungle, fairy, and princess are easily explained as part of The Enchantresses personality, but how does a spy fit in? Well, she loves solving problems and she is smart and cunning. She also quite enjoys staying hidden and sneaking around without anyone seeing her.

The enchantress is certainly part pirate. Part pirate captain to be precise. She may be quiet most of the time, but that is simply because she is carefully calculating the right thing to say and when to have the most impact. She knows how to take charge and when. And she knows when is best to take the rest of her “crews” advice.

The Mad Hatter is certainly a quieter part of her. She hides it well but it’s still there. She… I… survived a lot of heartbreak, perhaps not as much as most, but her heart breaks for anyone who is hurting and that has a way of wearing on a person. It is only natural for a little bit of madness to seep through every once in a while.

She is very different than any other character I’ve ever been, but at the same time is much like a combination of all the characters. The Enchantress in me is still developing. Still writing her story. This chapter is only just beginning. But I already know who the Enchantress is. She is kind, and loving, just a bit mysterious, not afraid of adventure, and ready to take on the world. I don’t know what this next chapter will bring exactly, but the Enchantress in me is ready to take on the world with confidence and grace.

 

                   Thank you for going on this journey with me!

Costumes And Characters: Mad Hatter

I would have to say that my love of hats really started with being a spy. I don’t know where the connection between spies and fedoras originally came from, but we decided that spies needed to wear fedoras. And that was the first time I remember really starting to wear hats. I started collecting them after that. I have probably five or so fedoras, including one covered in pink sequins. Then my love of fedoras turned into a love for hats of any kind. Pirate hats, top hats, bowler hats, any kind of hat really. And then it began. The Mad Hatter in me started to make an appearance. And so begins the most interesting chapter of all, because who’s more interesting than a Mad Hatter?

I, like most kids, grew up knowing the Disney version of the Mad Hatter. Short, old, rambling, crazy Mad Hatter in the Disney Alice in Wonderland. He wasn’t my favorite character, that’s for sure. But then, when I was about sixteen, I watched a miniseries on Netflix about sort of a modern Alice in Wonderland. The story itself was a bit strange, it was Alice in Wonderland after all, but I was intrigued by their interpretation of the Mad Hatter. He wasn’t mad, not really, just misunderstood, and a little crazy. He was actually quite sweet and ends up falling in love with Alice. At the end he misses her so much that he leaves Wonderland and goes back to her world to be with her. But this Mad Hatter was completely different than any other interpretation I had ever seen before. Such as the Tim Burton version with Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter for example. He was a bit too mad for my taste. Little too creepy. But then there was the Mad Hatter in the show Once Upon a Time, he was very much like the miniseries version. And I liked him a lot.

So, October 2012, before I turned seventeen, I bought my first top hat. It was a dark blue, it was from some Halloween store and was cheaply made and didn’t fit quite right, but I loved it. I put a big flower on it and wore it to a party our friends host every year, it was Mad Hatter Day after all! And then I became obsessed. We were going to have a Once Upon a Time Party in November and I was going to be the Mad Hatter. I searched and searched for just the right pieces for my costume. It had to be perfect. I got bouncy hair pieces that I could clip in. I had my hat already but it needed more. I bought some funky ribbon to tie around the middle and the extra hung down the back. Then I had a big scarf around my neck poking out of the most awesome jacket I own. It’s this cool blue green color and has swirls in the pattern. Then I had half finger gloves and knee high socks to match. It was perfect. My own crazy interpretation of the Mad Hatter.

I would go on to dress as the Mad Hatter for Halloween and I would wear my hat for New Years and other random events. Then the Mad Hatter found his way into my writing. I wrote, and am still writing, at least three different poems about the Mad Hatter. Two of them were for writing projects in school. One of them I actually submitted to a writing magazine on campus and it was printed in it. I was asked to read it at a reading for students who had their work in the magazine. I was terrified. I hate speaking in public where all the attention is on me. I’m a writer for a reason. You can read my work without me being present. I’m the girl behind the curtain; I’d rather be the writer hiding behind the page.  But I did it. I got up there and read my poem in front of everyone. I am glad I did it, but don’t know that I will rush to do it again.

I often wonder if I will end up like the Mad Hatter. By myself in a little cottage, alone with my collection of hats. Of course I’m usually thinking of that when I can’t sleep and am left to find company in my own crazy imagination. I get stuck in my head and it leads me to places I don’t necessarily want to go. The madness occasionally seeps out into my day as well. I find myself rambling more than usual or I start laughing for no reason in particular and can’t stop myself.

Turning into the Mad Hatter has had its good parts too though. I don’t care what other people think of me as much as I used to. I don’t care if they think I’m a little crazy because I am, why hide it? And if I hadn’t been obsessed with the Mad Hatter then I wouldn’t have written the poem that gave me the opportunity to share my writing, and that has given me the confidence to start sharing it with the world. If I didn’t have a little bit of Mad Hatter in me I probably wouldn’t have this blog right now. I would still be too afraid to share what I write. And of course the Mad Hatter has inspired my now quite large hat collection. I now have at least 25 hats in all sorts of styles. The Mad Hatter, like every other character, is very much still in me somewhere. And sometimes, usually late at night, the Mad Hatter in me will make an appearance...

 

 

Tomorrow is Halloween! Come back tomorrow to see how all of these characters tie into the character I currently consider myself.