Bittersweet Memories

The other day I was talking with a nice gentleman, discussing what I like to do. I mentioned I am a writer and he asked if I had anything published. Some of you already know the answer to this particular question, some may not. But the answer is yes, that I self-published a short story on Amazon Kindle a few years back. He asked what it was about and all I could manage to say was "it's about a girl who decided to go on a cruise" I was at a loss for words. Why couldn't I manage to describe my own story? And then the answer hit me. I haven't read it in a very long time, in fact, I had been avoiding it. Trying to forget it...

You see, this particular story is very different than most of my other stories. This story is a mix of my real memories and a fictional adventure. There’s not just a bit of myself worked in-between the lines, there are real true memories on paper for all to see. And those memories, happy when I wrote them, are now almost painful to remember.

They say "you don't know what you have till it's gone" but what they don't say is that when you do know exactly what you have and you find it gone, it hurts even more. We had something special. The people we met on that first cruise. But life happened, things were said, feelings were hurt, and our friendship fell apart. I miss them. And that was why I was avoiding reading my story. But I came home that night and knew what I needed to do. I picked up my tablet and forced myself to read it. Read it start to finish. Not without a few tears, but I did it. And I am so glad I did.

It’s a story about taking chances. Not being afraid to do things that scare you. Especially when you know in your heart it's what you're supposed to do. I found the courage to relive those beautiful bittersweet memories. I know we may never make more amazing memories with those particular people again, but that doesn’t mean I should forget the ones we did make. Because that cruise did change my life. The people we met helped mold me into the person I am today. We were supposed to be on that cruise, just as the girl in the story was supposed to be on her cruise. I know now that, just because I am afraid of happy memories turning to sad ones, doesn't mean that I should stop making them. Instead I will learn from them, and find the courage to smile at them instead of cry over them. The people may not be in my life anymore, but the memories, the memories last forever. And that is truly a beautiful thing.

If you would like to read my short story it is called Pineapple and Hand Sanitizer