Tuesday, May 26, 2015

The Definition of a Friend


Friends. I’ve been thinking a lot about friends recently and how at times it seems I don’t have any. So when a friend of mine took the time to send me a Facebook message a few weeks ago making sure I knew how much he appreciated my friendship, I was touched. And intrigued. I began thinking about who a friend really is.

What is a friend? What does the word "friend" even mean? The official dictionary definition is "a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection" Yes, that may be true. But what does the word "friend" mean to you? We all say we have friends, or sometimes that we don't have any friends. There are different levels of friends, different labels that society has put on relationships. There are strangers, then acquaintances, people you work with, people you go to school with. And somewhere along the line you start labeling people as friends, just friends, good friends, best friends, more than friends. There are endless categories to define relationships. But every one of those categories means something different to every person. Everyone has a different definition for who a friend is to them. Is it someone who is always there for you no matter what? Or is it someone who is always ready to laugh at your jokes? Someone who knows what your favorite movies are? Someone who just bothers to say hi to you in the hallway? Or is it someone who just asks you to be their friend on Facebook?

The word “friend” has come to mean anything from someone you barely know who just happens to be your friend on Facebook, to someone you tell everything to. It is amazing how many meanings one word can have. What is important is that you know what the word means to you, and that your friends know the same. Because there are many different levels, and everyone chooses a different quality that their definition of a friend would have. It is important that everyone is on the same page when it comes to the meaning of the word.

So, what is my definition of a friend? Well, My definition of a friend is someone who isn't afraid to tell me the truth when I do something wrong, but at the same time would be sympathetic and try to help me through the mess I got myself into. Someone who would be there for me when I need it most, but also when I’m just looking for someone to hang out with. Someone who, not only shows that they are my friend by making an effort to stay in my life, but will also come out and tell me that they want to be my friend. Someone who wants to be my friend and isn’t afraid to admit it.

These may seem like high expectations, but is it a bad thing to have high expectations when it comes to our relationships? The problem comes when we do not live up to our own expectations. If you expect your friend to be there for you in your time of need, you should be ready and willing to be there for them in theirs. It is also important that you both know where you stand with each other. My friend helped me understand this by saying that he appreciates my friendship. I then told him much the same thing. It’s mutual, much like the dictionary definition, "a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection." Make sure your friends know what they mean to you today.

Everyone has a different definition for the word “friend.” What is your definition of a friend? Tell me in the comments!